The Rise of The Tuluminati, our Guide to the Hip Location Tulum, Mexico
This is dedicated to our beautiful customer base in Tulum, hopefully with some forgiveness. Photo courtesy of Sophie Allegra.
This is our guide to the best of everything this beautiful but weird luxurious hippy hipster town in The Mexican Caribbean has to offer with a doffing of our hats to the Tuluminati tribe.
Firstly who the hell are the Tuluminati? Well they seem to be a bunch of beautiful people who live, travel, blog and pose for instagram in Tulum but who clearly eat a lot less tacos than anyone else in Mexico. They float around barefooted on toned tattooed legs in white outfits with stunning hats and clear juice fasted spirulina fed faces.
Photo of Rosa Crespo
I have now experienced that there are two types of these Tuluminatis, on the one hand you have the more lip enhanced, (or will do when they age over 27 and they start to deflate), Tuluminati's who look similar to the other ones I'm about to introduce you to but yet with much more boring instagrams, unless you're looking at it for porn purposes, or fashion if you want bikinis the size of threads... possibly actually made from threads.... usually from organic rose petals given to them in St Barts when they posted their butt in the swing in the pool in a luxury hotel last week. They either made their money doing just the above or came into it, who cares really.
Or there are the other types, who may actually live in Tulum. They spend their days doing new forms of acro yoga or spiritual coaching, have new words for chakras and auras that I can't even remember and run so many awesome sounding projects my eyes and ears both hurt. They basically make me miss the more grounded tie-dye trouser wooly jacket wearing tarot card reading hippies of Brighton. Or even the Astanga barefooted rebirth loving hippies of Goa.
Saying that, I fully respect their way of living. They have basically chosen one of the most beautiful places in the world to live or travel and have embraced it. If they're not just hash tagging themselves naked in front of Hotel Ahau or staying in $400 dollar shacks on the beach they are attending $300 one day events in the region with DJs as serious looking as their pouts. If they are the type actually living here they seem to be running pretty awesome sustainable festivals or divine workshops, so hats off to them, a big ol' Tuluminati hat off to them actually because fuck it, why work our asses off to just pay tax and die. These guys are LIVING THE DREAM. Well their instagrams say they are. It's just in reality this area is pretty poor financially so when you cruise around town and the region you see the way local people are living and this makes the Tuluminatis just stand out so bloody much.
photo courtesy Tuluminati
Enough about the visual elite, for the rest of us who float between these Tuluminatis, the local communities, Mexicans from all over this beautiful land making their lives and projects here plus the diverse international community here, this guide is for you. So if you want to mix up your days between rebirthing your soul with Ayahuasca, diving into turquoise stunning cenotes, dipping in the Caribbean and stuffing your face with the best food from the region without having to shoot mushroom tea up your butt this is the best guide you will find.
Let's start with food I'm hungry and Mexican breakfasts are basically the best in the world.
1) The Pitted Date vegan restaurant in Aldea Zama. Fucking delicious basically. Although guys please keep your portions big, us plant based lovers need lots of that nutrition to keep us going.... I recommend the Bagelwich, the chilaquiles, so many vegan places bore the fuck out of this delicious breakfast dish but these guys don't, plus the full works omelette. Based in Aldea Zama.
2) Raw love. This is so Tulum and so frigging yummy. The best chocolate shakes, raw food desserts, which are my favourite, delicious raw toast with raw vegan cheese topping and all kinds of hot and delicious beverages to drink while chatting about your chakras and festival projects. Based in town at an extremely awesome people watching location, or on the beach in the most popular yet beautiful hotel called Ahau, the one where everyone takes their instagram shots...
3) Palma central. It's a funky food truck park towards the end of town on the way to Muyil. It has food from all over the world, a bar, live music AND table service. I love Mexico for this. They also have pretty cute but good quality kid's playground to entertain your little ones while you feast on Thai curry, Arepas, Poke bowls and Micheladas.
4) Holistika. This place is just insane. Again at the end of town but in the jungle and just designed to replicate heaven, well without the beach, but still very cool. I love the Kundalini yoga run by @swanloveholistics on a Sunday. They have an art walk, a hotel with swimming pools, have loads of retreats and an amazing restaurant. The pizza is divine as is the burgers and vegan hot dogs. We ate here on Christmas Eve with the whole family a delicious vegetarian buffet and they even whipped out a few vegan pizzas for us.
5) For anyone who wants to experience the real food of Mexico THE STREET FOOD, plus feed your family for less than £5 here is your list.
Tamales. Oh my god I love them, loads of food stands have them, banana leaves stuffed with mashed corn and vegetables or meat covered in habanero salsa, wash it down with horchata a cinnamon rice milk drink and you'll be super satisfied. They're on roadside stalls all over town.
There's an amazing quesadilla place which also does just veggies. Yummy and she handmakes her tortillas, the best way to eat them. Go up Avenida Satelite away from town towards jungle not beach, go first right on Calle Polar Pte.
Granaderos Vegan or Veggie burgers... He hand makes everything and even delivers burgers to you via bike, hello papi.... What a dream...
Lastly Tacos: a street food taco place, that also does veggie tacos, you have to eat tacos, end of. It's near the quesadilla place on the corner of satelite before you go down the road for quesadilas. Enjoy!
So for experiences.... What can you do in Tulum to pass the time
1) Swim in the insane caribbean sea, obviously. It takes my breath away. I recommend the public beach next to the ruins, cycle or come early in the morning if it's high season.
2) Kan Lum laguna, A lake with a cenote in the middle, I know! It's just stunning.
3) All the cenotes on the highway Tulum-Coba which leaves from the centre of town. They're all beautiful. The most famous is Gran Cenote but it can get packed later in the day. Cenote Crystal the other side of town is less packed. What is a cenote? A stunning sometimes turquoise (they often have to clean them to get the this way by the way) sink hole in the ground which opens up to exquisitely sacred linked water this whole region has underground.
4) The ruins. The Mayan's knew what they were doing in so many ways but definitely when they built their prime piece of real estate overlooking the Caribbean sea with it's own private beach. A beautiful temple and archeological site worth seeing.
5) Stroll through town and see all the unique boutiques, eateries and delights of the town from the start of the beach road into town to the town hall in the centre.
6) Hit up some yoga classes at Co Con Amor (also great food and refill vegan shop and cafe), or at Holistika or more expensively all over the beautiful beachfront and jungle in front of it.
7) Get out of town, this is a great hub for exploring the region. Mexican Kan Tours are a great eco responsible tour company who have tours all over the region from visiting Mayan villages and more ruins, to floating down lazy turquoise rivers. (Have I used this colour adjective a lot in this post? Come here and see why.)
There is so much more to see, you can do so by catching the local collectivos, or posher Ado bus to ruins like coba, hire a car or cycle around the Tulum area. If you want any more info drop us a link and we'll set you in the right direction.
As with all travel use your senses and knowledge, obviously find refill places for your water thermos, ask around or your hotel. Don't use plastic straws or at little of any plastic as you can. Chemical products damage the sea, cenote and our skin so use natural ones or none. And be careful what you consume and where it comes from, when you leave Tulum the locals don't and that dark energy can be left behind at the detriment to everyone else here.
Here are some pieces of jewellery the Tuluminati's seem to love and that are inspired by Tulum, it's beauty, irony and magic.
Honeycomb White Brass & Abalone Shell Earrings, Large- Marama
Flower fake piercing with surgical steel pin
Hill Tribe Silver Spiral Drop Earrings
Gold Spike Faux Stretcher
Thanks for reading xxx